Brooke: See picture at left.  Newlywed, 28, living in central PA. Degree in Music, working in pharmacy. Attempted and survived online dating. Dabbles in yoga, cooking, and is a total music nerd.

Army Boy: Brooke’s husband, former childhood friend who she loves to embarrass by telling the story of how he signed her yearbook in 6th grade. Also a total hunk.

Wesley:(aka As You Wish) (aka Peepants) Our first child- a beagle puppy. Furbabies rule!

Mom and Dad: … parents

Mia: Dog. Creepy-smart. Known for getting in trouble and blaming it on stuffed animals

Katie: Bff. Attended the same college in PA, encourages my going-to-hell tendencies. Future partner batshit-crazy cat lady-dom.

Danielle: My long-lost sister living halfway across the country. Not really, but sometimes it seems that way.

Seth: Danielle’s perfect husband. Who has invited me to come live in KC and affectionately refers to me as “Basement Wife.” It’s like ‘Big Love’, only without the bad hair.

London: Danielle and Seth’s dog. Also creepy smart. May be secretly corresponding with Mia and Wesley via phone/internet/carrier pigeons

—- Boy, —— Guy, etc: Code names for guys that I dated. To protect their identities because I’m not a total jerk…very thinly veiled references because I am still slightly a jerk.

Why TxtingMrDarcy?

Yes, obviously Mr Darcy never had a cell phone. Or txted anyone. But he is that elusive, perfect man, the kind that only a woman could think up. He’s the perfect combination of dreamy and aloof, the type that keeps women wondering until he brilliantly and romantically reveals his feelings. Obviously, since I was willing to subject myself to the online meat market, I was searching for my own Mr Darcy. And having to deal with the disconnect of dating in the digital age.

He is SO stuck with me.