Halloween for Wusses

I received a surprising amount of response to my recent post about being a huge wuss who can’t watch scary movies or stand having the bejeezus scared out of me.  To all of you, I am glad I’m not alone. 🙂

Today I was reading the new book by Audrey Niffenegger, “Her Fearful Symmetry.” I’m not terribly far into it, but so far it’s sweet and sad and everything that I was hoping. On top of that, it’s shaping up to be a ‘ghost story,’ though nothing of the really frightening sort. (Yet. I may have to come back to this post and eat my words. If that’s possible when they are electronic.)

It made me realize that while I cannot watch anything remotely scary if my life depended on it, I AM able to READ pretty much anything.  Think I’m kidding? Some samples from my ridiculously large reading list include a number of Stephen King novels, and “The Exorcist” by William P Blatty.

For those of you who will not be going to see “Paranormal Activity,” or “Saw 27.5”, or curling up with Michael Myers, Freddy, or Jason in the next couple of days, might I suggest some literary alternatives that came to mind for some spooky Halloween reads.

(Note: If I were more intelligent I would have had this idea a week ago. To give anyone a chance to be safely engrossed in any novel BY Halloween. I have never claimed intelligence as one of my higher virtues.)

“Salem’s Lot”- Stephen King : A reeeeeally creepy vampire novel where the majority of the villains are neither adolescent, or sparkly.

“Gerald’s Game”- Stephen King: Probably one of his lesser known stories, with a totally creepy context and even more cringe-worthy ending.

The “Abhorsen” Trilogy- Garth Nix: A little bit young adult, a lotta bit creepy. The first book is completely addictive. I’ve read the series at least 4 times total.

The Twilight Saga- Stephenie Meyer: I cannot tell a lie. I devoured them. And they ARE about vampires. Vampires ARE good for Halloween. Yes, I’m reaching. Whatever.

Wuthering Heights- Emily Bronte: One of my earliest faves. A great piece of spooky atmosphere and human passion verging on madness. (woooOOOOOoooo)

“Watchers”- Dean Koontz: My personal favorite of his suspense tales. Multiple frightening villains always seem to be one step ahead of the main characters. One of whom is a golden retriever. *two thumbs up*

“The Graveyard Book”- Neil Gaiman: If you haven’t read this book that won Gaiman the Caldecott, you realllllly should. A combination of his love of varying types of mythology and a children’s book. A slightly creepy children’s book, but a great story.

The Dark Hunter Series- Sherrilyn Kenyon:  Vampires, Gods and Sex. Oh My. (Oh Yummy.)

“The Forest of Hands and Teeth”- Carrie Ryan:  Zombies anyone?

“Pride and Prejudice and Zombies”- Jane Austen and Seth Grahame-Smith: Lizzie and Darcy not only fall in love, but kick zombie ass. SWEET.  Totally irreverent and basically a must for an Austen fan.

“The Hunger Games” and “Catching Fire”- Suzanne Collins:  Think “Survivor”. Post Apocalypse. And all the government wants to do is severely eff with you. Yeah, they’re like that. Make sure you have at least a weekend, because you will. not. put. them. down.

So there. Not ALL of the cool kids will be going to awesome costume parties or watching slasher flicks. Some of us will be READING CREEPY BOOKS. In our PJS. With… TEA. (Wow that looks SO lame written out. Whateverbiteme.)

I’m sure that I’m forgetting a bunch of great, creeptastic reads, but maybe these will make you think of some of your own favorites.  And if you have some, I’d love some suggestions!

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3 thoughts on “Halloween for Wusses

  1. Twilight was really scary! Not so much in the “Oh my gosh, don’t turn around, don’t turn around…AAAHHHHHHHH” kind of way…as “Damn, she gets the love of her life as a teenager?!?!?! All I got as a teenager was detention! Motherfugger! I am sooo screwed in the “live happily ever after” department!”
    smh…

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