Except That I Lied. Because I AM Blogging This.

Hey, did you hear about this?

I couldn't make this shit up.

I was there Saturday. Not, like, IN the building. But in that town. Really, screw the whole “I’m mysterious and live in Central PA” thing. I couldn’t make this up if I tried.

I got a txt from my mom on Sunday morning: “Did you hear about the leak at TMI?”

Initially, I thought she was kidding. Things like that only happen in science fiction movies. And apparently in small towns in Central PA.

According to the article, radiation was contained to the building itself. But employees were sent home so that he area could be cleaned. And the public really wasn’t notified. Granted, “Happy Thanksgiving, here’s a Radiation Leak!” isn’t the best holiday greeting. And causing a mass exodus from the area would be, to say the least, a bad idea.

I could always just focus on the positives. At this point, my ovaries are probably glowing. Radioactive kids could be a bonus. I wouldn’t lose them in the park or at the mall… AB lives in that area as well, it’s practically a guarantee. Also, since we’re all farmalicious in this area, our local produce in the next year is going to be AWESOME. Like, “end world hunger awesome”. Here, have some of our GINORMOUS tomatoes and corn!

Negatives? Radiation supposedly created Godzilla. And those creeps from “The Hills Have Eyes.” So there’s a distinct possibility that I could have children that are cannibals and have to drop them off in the desert somewhere so that they can lure in unsuspecting tourists. I mean, I’d love them anyway and definitely mourn them. If they weren’t too scary, I might even keep a little picture of them on my dresser. But sometimes you have to choose between having your children and having your children eat you.

If it came down to that, sorry. I’m a wuss. And like being alive.

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3 thoughts on “Except That I Lied. Because I AM Blogging This.

  1. Seriously Brooke, there are so many pluses/plusses, how the hell do you spell that?

    Anyhow, there are certain positives about having kids who could star in cheesy Hollywood horror flicks!

    Oh and I’ll take a dozen of those huge ears of corn. I guess this means I’m going to have to invest in some heavy duty floss!

  2. “But sometimes you have to choose between having your children and having your children eat you.”

    You have brilliantly summed up the very core of parenting wisdom. Not bad for a chick with no kids.

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