New Year, New FREAKING OUT

Oh Internet, my Internet.

I am feeling overwhelmed.

Even typing that, I feel like a selfish, whiny baby. Many of you out there are facing REAL issues and pain, that make my hectic schedule and complaints seem so trivial…

January in anything medical or pharmacy related is a perfect storm of new insurances and confused people and broken computer systems…

Something like “GWAHSHITDAMN-WHYISN’TTHISRIGHT-DIDN’TWECHECKIT?!(FUCKFUCKFUCK)-THISWASWORKINGFINEYESTERDAY-WHYISTHERENOLIQUORINTHISPLACE-FINEI’LLJUSTEATCHOCOLATE-MATTBACKOFFTHECHEETOSSOHELPMEGOD-HELLBASTARDSMOTHERGRABBING-UGHMYBRAISKILLINGME-HOWISTHISHARDGODYOUPEOPLEAREIDIOTS…”

Etc. ad infinity.

Oh, and I started a new position. January First. It’s awesome and will challenge me in a million ways AND I get to work directly with Danielle which is basically the best.

But I’m an overachiever. And don’t like being the person who has to ask for help. Instead of accepting my limitations I feel like a pain in the ass and may just run around in circles possibly running into walls before I will bug my coworkers again. Counterproductive? Probably.

PLUS! We are back to Singers with a vengeance. As in with 2 concerts this weekend. And practices a few nights this week.

Which, um, kinda pissed me off last night. Because we got to rehearsal and right away things were sloppy and people were talking and not counting and we’ve been working on this music since JUNE PEOPLE. Remember those rehearsals that we had to come to DURING THE SUMMER?! WHAT IS YOUR FREAKING EXCUSE?! Probably as a result of having been in choir for four years with a director that terrified everyone and expected no less than perfection, I’m a stickler (read: BITCH). I learn my music. And have NO patience for those who don’t. Especially not the week of the concert, when we’ve had a couple of weeks off after our Christmas season.

So to recap: New job. New schedule. Concerts. Rehearsals (GAHSMASH). Trying to spend some time with Army Boy amidst all of this. Oh, and laundry/ironing/life?? Looks like the ironing might slip a bit.

The last couple of weeks, Army Boy and I got spoiled with the holiday weekends and seeing each other frequently due to various invitations. It’s getting less and less natural when we’re apart. I don’t sleep well without him anymore, which is something I never thought to see. I know that I’m ridiculously lucky, and I never want to forget that fact.

Tomorrow we’re starting the next step of our journey together (waits for all to vomit at use of sappy metaphor): Apartment hunting. We found these adorable places about a month ago, and the time just wasn’t right. The Divorce wasn’t moving along well, we weren’t really in a place to move in together before the beginning of the year, etc. But things are looking up, and it’s time to start searching.

I’ve told him that he has to be the rational one. The one that’s all “So, do people living here get stabbed frequently? And how about plagues of locusts? Do you have those? What about water/sewer/trash?” Honestly, I will probably be like “Wow, hi! I like your shoes. These are cute! Is that Fire Station noisy? Oooooh look, a bedroom and a bathroom and I LOVE IT LET’S DO IT NOW!” At which point he has permission to taze me and force me back to the car so that we may discuss this decision like grownups.

Wish me all kinds of luck. And patience, because it’s not my strong suit (hears collective “no shit!” from Internet) and I will probably need it until we find where we’ll end up.

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6 thoughts on “New Year, New FREAKING OUT

  1. Might as well just cut the ironing right off your to-do list now. Less angst later (assuming that sometime down the road you might have kids), since I don’t think I’ve ironed anything in about 10 years.

    Good luck with the apartment hunting!

  2. I slipped over here from MoseyAlong and found myself giggling out loud by the time I reached the “plagues of locusts” paragraph. Thanks for brightening my morning and good luck with the apartment search!

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