Cohabitation Update: Spiders and Centipedes and Stinkbugs, Oh My!

First things first, I have to say THANK YOU. I waffled so much about whether or not to publish my last post. Did I really want to go there? And talk about GOD on my blog?! 

Shockingly, I got some amazing feedback on that post. It was all extremely well thought-out, expressed and most importantly respectful. Wow.

After playing Insect Vigilante for the 50th time this morning, I was inspired to write an update on how things are going over here at Casa de TxtingMrDarcy.

We Got Bugz.

That is all.

Actually, no, that’s not all. But it continues to surprise me the sheer amout of life this one small house can hold. When we initally moved in and started cleaning, it was the spiders. All shapes and sizes, all of which required me to shrilly summon Army Boy and force him to commit insect homicide.

“That’s great!” family reassured us. “It means you have a dry house!”

“Dry is good,” I agreed to Army Boy. “I don’t do spiders, but I REALLY don’t do centipedes.” *shudder*

Guess what we started seeing next? BABY centipedes. Down in the basement. And where there are babies?

There are MOMMIES AND DADDIES. *shudder shudder gah gah gick gick ew!*

Sure enough, we saw our first monster running across the living room floor that evening. Again with the “Aaaaaaarrrrrmy Boooooy!”

These live in my basement. For serious.

(Here’s a secret: When Army Boy is home? There is no way in hell I am going near these beasts. But when I’m by myself, and the only way to dispose of them is to just woman up and squash em? I totally can. I just did about 10 minutes ago before throwing a load of laundry in. Yes. I am proud. You could have put a saddle on this thing. Much like the pony spider from a few weeks ago. It was the Kraken of centipedes. YES I saw “Clash of the Titans,” I’m a nerd. Would you have expected any less?)

Then there are the Stink Bugs. These are the James Bond of the Insect World. You make sure that all of your windows are totally sealed and that there is no way they’re getting in? And as you stand there with your arms crossed in triumph one will inevitably saunter across your window, all “Whut. You think you’re keeping me out? HA.”  As anyone who has dealt with these knows, if they see you coming to squish them they will employ their most effective weapon against you- stinkage. Now you are stuck in a sealed-up house that smells like ass and bug guts. FAIL.

We’re still having issues with our plumbing, which is unsurprising since it is an older home that was unoccupied for about 6 months. That doesn’t mean that I handle it in a mature way when my sink backs up YET AGAIN HOLY GOD, but I can accept that things could be worse.

The house almost seems to be aware of its limitations, because when we fired up the air conditioning for the first time this week (It’s upper 80s here in PA. And migraines are fun. The end.) it worked like a charm.

Army Boy and I are doing well with adjusting to living together. Apparently watching my mother run a house for years paid off, allowing me to easily switch to the mindset of noticing that the floor needs to be vacuumed, the bathroom could use to be freshened up and we’ve got at least one load of laundry to do. Meanwhile, Army Boy thinks in a more linear way. Plus, he’s completely wonderful at offering to get things done before I get home each day.

Quite frankly, I thought it would be more of a struggle to adjust to each other’s habits and idiosyncracies, but for now I’m going to consider myself extremely lucky and go with the flow.

As long as the flow doesn’t include more insects. BLEEECH.


2 thoughts on “Cohabitation Update: Spiders and Centipedes and Stinkbugs, Oh My!

  1. I do the same thing!! When my husband’s around, I am the biggest girl! When he isn’t, I am still the biggest girl but I suck it up and kill the darn thing. Because if I don’t, who knows where it’ll go. Ewww. I rather not think about it.

  2. Sometimes a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do! le’ sigh.
    Clash of the Titans. Bad reviews in my house. Who knew? I think they were too excited, sort of bound to be let down.

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