Tales From The Frat House: Can You Hear Me Now?

(Scene: The Ladies’ Bathroom at The Lego Block of Doom. Note: The term “Ladies’” is being used very loosely in this case. Brooke emerges from a stall and begins to wash her hands.)

Brooke: Dum de dum, wash wash wash.

(A “lady” enters, heads for a stall. Brooke doesn’t get a good look because of concentrating on the task at hand.)

(Heh, “At hand.” Get it?)


(Peeing sounds commence from stall. Brooke crosses to the paper towel dispenser, when-)

Stall Woman: Hey! Oh good, you home. Yeah, I’m glad I caught you. I wanted to tell you to use up that leftover roast chicken in the fridge.

(Brooke looks at Nonexistent Audience, as if to say “WTF?” Peeing noises continue.)

Stall Woman: Yeah, no, today’s the last day for it. I’mma make some ham and macaroni for dinner and- Uh huh, tell him Mommy loves him…

(Brooke wonders how the person on the other end of the phone cannot a: hear the peeing and b: tell the conversation is being conducted from a PUBLIC RESTROOM. It sure isn’t the happy babbling of a mountain stream, if you catch my drift.)

(She shakes her head in disgust, and exits. She returns to the Frat House row)

Brooke: Girls, you’ll never believe what just happened—

(End Scene.)



2 thoughts on “Tales From The Frat House: Can You Hear Me Now?

  1. I can’t judge her too much, because I remember one very frantic conversation I had with a customer service rep while I was hugely pregnant. I could only go about 20 minutes between bathroom breaks, and this phone call was stretching on perilously close to my breaking point.

    When my bladder could take it no longer, I took that conversation with me into the bathroom. And, try as I might to cover the microphone of the phone with one hand, I’m sure that hapless rep heard every drop.

    Alas, but pregnancy is SO glamorous.

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